⚡ NOW HIRING: Junior Smite Intern ⚡

Department: Divine Enforcement Division
Location: Realm 225, Subsector: Confused Mortals
Position Type: Eternal Internship (with potential for ascension)

Summary:

Heaven’s a mess, Earth’s worse, and the last intern accidentally blessed an entire biker gang. We're looking for a Appocalyptic Clerk to assist in divine compliance audits. Your duty? Sift the faithful from the flammable — and enforce cosmic balance one rooftop at a time.

Job Responsibilities:

🕊️ Right Click:
Mark houses as blessed, cursed, or “on watch”
(This alerts central divinity systems for deeper review. Maybe.)
⚡ Left Click:
Destroy houses to smite heretics, extinguish error, or make bold statements
👁️ Hover over a house:
Reveal the divine strike radius — witness the ripple of your choices before unleashing them
📜 Interpret divine chat transcripts:
Mortal messages will appear. Spot keywords and intent. Apply faith or fire accordingly.

Controls Recap:

Right Click = Mark
Left Click = Destroy
Hover = Preview Judgment Spread

Career Path Perks:

Your role isn’t static. Faithful execution (pun intended) leads to divine promotions and sector transfers, including:

Expanded territory with increased believer density
Access to more volatile housing clusters
Occasional exposure to unstable WIP features (by accident or fate)
Greater autonomy (and greater HR scrutiny)

Climb from Intern to Senior Auditor, eventually achieving titles like The One Who Clicks Last or Regional Flame Coordinator.

Perks Include:

Zero paperwork
Infinite judgment
Questionable omniscience
A thrilling amount of moral ambiguity

Requirements:

No divine certification required (yet)
Must handle irreversible decisions without blinking
Curiosity discouraged regarding folders labeled DO_NOT_OPEN, backdoor, or update_test_v4_final2_REAL
HR compliance training available in case of "events"

Apply Now

Let your cursor be your halo.
The skies are watching. The mortals aren't ready.
You're gonna click great.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

✨ Divine Gratitude Scroll ✨
Our chaotic cosmic creation wouldn’t echo, quake, or quack quite the same without the brilliant work of these generous creators:

⚡ Sound & Fury

LightningCrash.wav by NoiseNoir — Link (CC BY 4.0)
Distant Midwest Tornado Siren by MichaelSearsAudio — Link (CC BY 4.0)
Explosion (Close/Near) (Mixed) by EvanBoyerman — Link (CC BY-NC 3.0)
Cracking Earthquake by uagadugu — Link (CC0)
Meteor Whoosh, Duck Quack, Laptop Beeps, Rock Smashes, and more from kind contributors on Freesound.org — huge thanks!

🎵 Harmonies of the Heavens

Kevin MacLeod classics:
- "Lobby Time"
- "Airport Lounge"
- "Mining by Moonlight"
- "Shades of Spring"
  Licensed under CC BY 4.0
  via incompetech.com
Additional music & SFX by:
- code_box ("In Other News") — CC0
- AudioCoffee ("Political (loop)") — CC BY-NC 4.0
- azimuth413, Robinhood76, jjchubby, Albaaa3, M-Murray, doxent, cooljoe — Thank you for the audio soul!